I’ve been looking forward to today all week. It’s my one day with no structure, go-to, do-this, or meet-them. I thought it would be a rest day, take the dogs for a long long walk, smooch around, maybe even bake a cake, read a bit, all that stuff. But then I fell in love with this play I’m writing and last night I found myself battling with the idea of a rest day versus a writing day. I need the rest and yet I’m itching to write. Ah, the excitement of writing that I’ve not felt for yonks and yonks. So, I thought, fair enoughski… take the dogs for a long meander, a morning of prayer and being happy with my God, then an afternoon of thinking about the radio play, and an evening of writing it. A perfect day. A bit for God and a bit for me. Fair do’s.
Hah! Not so.
Listen, this blog must never preach because I am a happy bumbler. I’m not a wise and learned person imparting great wisdom. I am content to bumble and to learn and to slowly reach some understanding. So please don’t read what follows as a lump of preachery. It’s just me being me. Happy to be me but no sort of advertisement for ANYTHING.
When I woke up on this lovely free day, I read for a while (yeah, Isaiah. Obvs) and then pottered through and as the coffee made itself I checked my emails. There was one from a sick friend sent 40 minutes before, asking for help – so swig the coffee, fall into the shower, get dressed, open the back door for the hounds, and buzz around to her cottage. Plans forgotten, day off forgotten, play … what play?
But here’s the thing, my little bloggies, although I can do nothing for her except be with her, although I am probably the most unhelpful person in the world, and certainly the clumsiest and most awkward and lumpiest (and a bit sweary), this morning, by the grace of God, I was everything my friend needed. Not because of anything I could do or anything I am, but because God has brought me to this village, and He has brought her to this same village, and He has given us His love for each other. So, when I stumbled through her door, and waddled up her stairs, and sat on the edge of her bed, I took Christ’s love with me.
Isn’t that amazing? All she needed to feel a tiny better was the company of someone who loves her. No syringes, aseptic technique, drug administration required. Just a pal. Isn’t that amazing?
It blooming’ well is. Actually. And here’s another thing – the road to my usual dog walking beach is closed and the diversion takes about three days, so although I could leave my pal for an hour to walk the dogs I couldn’t take them all that way. And I needed petrol in case we have to do a hospital dash (the last time she needed an ambulance it took 6 hours to get here) so we went to another smaller, grubbier, stonier beach on the way to the petrol station.
And there I looked into that grey never ending sky and realised that I’d forgotten something in all the bluster and dash – to give the day to God. It’s His anyway. Who am I kidding with my plans and timetable? The Earth is the Lord’s and everything in it.
That’s from the Bible but don’t ask me where and I don’t have time to look it up, cos guess what – I have to be somewhere else, doing something else. My friend needs ice and I’ve just remembered that I have some! Isn’t that great?
You know, God’s love is so strong, so all-encompassing, that we can turn to Him whenever and He will not fail us. When we are at death’s very door, we can turn to Him and we will find love. When we are facing a hopeless situation, He is our hope. When we don’t know what to say He will give us words. If we are submitted to Him, if we have given the moment and the day to Him, it is His. We are His. All is well.
His love overwhelms me.
So, no plans today, just God.